I type git commit
and I'm stuck inside of vim
it's been six years now

learning JavaScript
is like a really cool sword
you hold by the blade

I have to git pull
I'm not religious, but Lord
please no merge conflicts

nineteen ninety nine
my first site was a page of
Dragonball Z gifs

school taught us Java
and said we'd be Java devs
boy, they were way off

imagine if we
stopped gatekeeping junior devs
too bad we're a-holes

put in a PR
where I forgot to remove
console log("please work");

looked up array slice
eight times this week; here comes my
imposter syndrome

TDD is great
wait, the deadline is for when?
we'll write tests later

my work day is just
faking confidence for the
product manager

let's take a moment
to remember the short lives
of our side projects

I wrote Hello World
maybe three years ago so
yes I know Python

no time to fix tests
git force push no verify
so long, pre-commit

QA just called in
a full bomb disposal squad
my code did not pass

I just spent two hours
choosing a colour palette
should have done law school

I pretend I know
what this "Kubernetes" is
it sounds like it's drugs

I do something called
hype-driven development
I like shiny things

I say I'm full stack
but I just never got good
at any one thing