Transcription:
A.P. (via call): Dude, I saw your message that your phone was stolen and you're in the hospital... Are you okay?
Programmer: I'm fine! I'm at home...
Programmer: I wrote that just so I wouldn't have to work today... Did you see that Windows is getting blue screens everywhere??
A.P.: But you use Linux!!
Programmer: Exactly! I would be the only one working and I would still be called all the time to "fix" the crashed computers.
A.P.: Clever!
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T-shirt: Team Kernel Panic